The lesson from Nengapeta for our times

Blessed Marie-Clémentine Anuarite Nengapeta (29 December 1939 – 1 December 1964)

I often reflect on the courage of Nengapeta, a young Congolese religious woman who dedicated her short life to the Sisters of the Holy Family in Kisangani. Sr. Nengapeta lived in an uncertain time of colonialism and conflict in the Democratic Republic of Congo. This did not deter her from giving of herself fully to her duties at the convent.

Having lived in relatively recent times of the 20th century, she is a relatable figure to African women. Any woman will tell you that there is nothing that causes more fear than the risk of sexual violence. Sr. Nengapeta came face-to-face with this fear from Colonel Pierre Olombe, a rebel, who wanted to rape her. When he did not succeed, he killed her. Sr. Nengapeta was so brave, even in her painful and unjust death at 24 years of age.

Sr. Nengapeta was beatified on 15 August 1985 by Pope John Paul II and was given the title "blessed". Beatification is the second-last step to sainthood in the Roman Catholic Church. Her feast day is on 1st December, which is also World AIDS Day. Africa bears a big burden of HIV/AIDS as the most affected region in the world. Young women in Africa aged 15–24 years are at high risk of being infected with HIV. People living with HIV still experience stigma, in addition to the socio-economic challenges of maintaining healthy lives. HIV prevention and treatment has come a long way but more efforts are needed to end AIDS. For the 2021 commemoration of World AIDS Day, UNAIDS is calling on all of us to take urgent steps to "End inequalities. End AIDS. End pandemics". There is an urgent need to redress the inequalities that drive AIDS, especially during this time of the COVID-19 pandemic.

My prayer is that, through the intercession of Blessed Nengapeta, we will have the courage to protect life and peace in Africa. We can do this by strongly condemning all violence against girls and women, particularly sexual violence, which has robbed many of their lives. We must work together to end the inequalities that feed the vulnerabilities millions of young African girls face, which increase their risk of HIV infection. We should also support those living with HIV and educate ourselves with the right information to respond effectively to AIDS.

Intention

Maya Angelou said, "I believe the heart is the only thing we can trust". For some time, I struggled to wrap my head around this because i tend to be (believe i am) a very practical person. But when i paused to think about it, i realised that i actually follow my heart often. Not in the whimsical way modern movies might sometimes present it but in a cultivated manner, where i have learnt to trust my intuition in addition to weighing my reality.

Three years ago, i made a bold professional (heart) decision even when the timing and finances seemingly told a different story. I knew that if i did not follow my heart then, i would miss an important opportunity to grow and be happier. Interestingly, the courage to jump in 2016 came from another heart decision in 2009 that prepared me for an even greater leap seven years later. This time my fears were greatly reduced because i had began to identify the synchronicity in my life's run. It is also not a coincidence that i received a profound book, The Power of the Heart by Baptist de Pape, at the end of 2018 and it was my first read as i began the new year. I still have many questions from 2016 that are unanswered but i am learning to trust that living the question is sometimes a necessary step to recognising and accepting the answer, which might not come immediately or in the form i anticipate. I am learning to be patient with what my heart is saying and being confident in this connection.

In order for you to connect with your heart, you need silence and an attitude of gratitude. The heart's messages get drowned by noise and you cannot take note of them until you learn to regularly practice some quiet time. I have a tradition of taking a retreat as part of the ways in which i seek silence. As you give thanks for what you have, you gradually connect deeper with your heart and open yourself up to even greater possibilities. A power that will keep you grounded and safe.

In a world where cruelty is an everyday occurrence, we can only defuse the violence and hatred by having the courage to act from the heart - the authentic source of love, kindness and cooperation. "What we do accumulates; the future is the result of what we do now" ~ Pema Chödrön ~

Colours of life

Quest

When the world has stopped
I lean
On the thick trunk
Of my think tree
And wonder

Where is harmony?
My roving eye searches the horizon
Of the rose-tinged dusky sky
Of its elusive rays, penetrating canopy

Vision,
Are you buried with the far-reaching roots
That trace back to medicine lineages
Forever lost to contemporary generations?

And you, peace
Why do you play hide-and-seek?
Whistling through the bamboo
Like the cool evening breeze
That deceptively caresses the face
Oh so close… but gone, in the blink of an eye

Reveal yourselves
For it is in earnest
That I seek

Standing by my book shelf

Lost in books, late again

Standing by my book shelf

Thumbing through pages

Rereading favourite excerpts

Fancifully hoping for a book getaway

Far from the ugliness of the world

Reminded others saw worse

So that i can stand tall today

Incredible beacons of courage

In the vile face of hatred, abuse, exclusion

They transformed it into stories of triumph

Into poetry i hold close to my heart

To sojourn through another test

A test of humanity, of truth, of justice

I stand by my book shelf

Musing how millions of words 

Give meaning to my life.

You

You with the sunshine style
You with the big heart
You with the sweet spirit
You with the beautiful smile
You with the spicy twist
You with the boundless warmth

Metamorphosis

I was laughing recently with childhood friends about how primary school memory doesn't get easily erased. Childhood memories, in all their colour and absurdity, remain vividly etched in the mind; defying an ageing body. I suppose it is why when we meet we shout each other's names in full as our teachers did, we rehash events in d.e.t.a.i.l and marvel at how we've grown because what we still see most is the childlike 'deskie' we exchanged notes and snacks with. The kid that metarmophisised into an adult but never quite left. The kid who lived loudly or shyly but felt deeply regardless.

Our childhood was largely sheltered and care-free. It was not without difficult moments…i would say it is the magnitude of the challenges we had to deal with that was greatly reduced or non-existent at that point in time. Then primary school gave way to steeper years of studying, hustling and demanding choices; from selecting subjects to emigration. In the blur of seeking footing, the spirit of living became part of the faded yellowed scrap books we signed with our whole hearts: "Roses are red, violets are blue…"

The post-primary journey became murky. It was not one with a set timetable, routine and meals. We encountered a world where not every person is happy or good. We reckoned with its dark side, that often mocks those who stand up for a cause or for the weak. Some floundered in this world where adulting was much harder than expected, some made costly mistakes, some lost faith others their shine… The scales fell from our eyes; our education was not foolproof, not all our teachers were heroes and we were not infallible.

But along came key lessons, that we can't change if we don't get out of our cocoons and that we will never know the beauty of our butterfly colours if we don't take the painstaking risk to grow, learn from our mistakes and live boldly.

Initially, we lacked the vocabulary to describe these lessons. We didn't quite know what to call them. Then we understood that it was a collection of what we had experienced, what we believed in, what we stood for and subsequently what we hoped for every fellow human being (some completely missed this memo).

Some believed the cruel world, that the options it presented are the only ones. Today they play to the gallery; caught up in performing a false life.

Some dared to question a world that doesn't care; to ask what they could do to change it, not only for their own benefit but for others too. Today they are living fully and even if they face obstacles tomorrow, they forge on; leaving the world a little bit better than they found it yesterday. They trace the threads on the cloth they've woven, with the warps and wefts of aspirations and achievements, to bequeath a warm wrap to the next child.

Celebrate more the child in you who once unwaveringly believed they were invincible. Be that kid again, that raced with all their might for their house, their school…for the collective win.